If you can not be happy with me, You can be happy with no one else...

03 May 2013 - 22:21

If you are not happy with me,
You cannot be happy with someone else....

In a storm,
Lost in time, in very deep…
Or in the wild cold of a winter, you are in your cabin…
Alone ...
Sitting down and thinking,
You know, there are such boring gloomy days…
It is such a day.
I ask myself ...
Waves of the sea;
indicates the severity of a wind blowing or a long-term missing?
I remember my first days at sea…

Year is 1974...
I am together with Captain Tosun onboard a ship named Eskişehir.
He  shouts from the Bridge with his baritone voice:
"Since two days, I see the same lighthouse on starboard beam, 
Speed up this damn ship! .. "

Wind force is 8; steam-powered main engine is full ahead; but ship’s speed over the ground is simply “zero’”...

How says the poet;
the earth is breathing ... "


My eyes searching the sun in a sky covered by dark gray clouds…
Even a glimpse of the sun showing the face through the thick clouds
Giving us a strange peace, such as the seven colors of the rainbow; despite the sorrow multiplying foams..

Do you know? Sailor feels a pain, deep in his heart, in such weathers.
Accelerated heartbeat, appetite is cut.
Can not sleep...
This situation is often experienced by sailors, so he/she is familiar with it, it is a way of life ...
Engineer, does not leave the engine room, and deck officers does not want to leave the bridge, though.

The winter of 1982 ...
43,000-DWT bulk carrier ship, trying to proceed with swings and rolls in a weather of 8-9 Beaufort, in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. Cargo is corn, laden from Norfolk and bounded for Rostock… Evereything seems OK in safety documents bot however, the ship is simply a rust-bucket…
An old, neglected, “ bad” ship ...
Location, bridge,
Weather reports, continuously broadcasting gale warnings of  strength 12.
Captain, Chief Officer, Chief Engineer, Radio Officer of the Watch Officer and Captain Dursun, who is an unschooled practical deck officer, nicknamed as Jackal, gathered.
All restless, all anxious...
Not enough, Chief cook steps in with a hurry…

"Below, Sir; pots, plates clashed, glasses are all broken… What shall we do, Sir...?"
Last weather report being revised and deciding what to do upon…
The Captain constantly eyes the barometer. Tapping with his finger, and reading ..
"Hey, it is falling too fast"

Captain, likes to double check  the barometer on the bridge with the one in his cabin. Asks Captain Dursun to do it.
"Captain Dursun," he says.
"Go and tap the barometer in my cabin."
Captain Dursun, nodding, leaves the bridge. 
A few seconds later the door opens again.
Dursun stretches his head in:
"Sir," he says,
"Shall I read it after tapping? .."


Fog descends to the sea ...
At dusk, while evening arrives early…
Just woke up ind the morning, while sunshine hurts our eyes…
Nothing but all fire of love, longing, yearning in the hearts of yours, mine, and all sailors’.

Not snowfall, not blizzard, neither rain nor storms…
It is the color of love and passion.
A passion whose abandonment is very difficult!

Sea calms down, I look into the sky with my head up for a long while.
My heart overflows;  I want to sing a song loudly with an indescribable enthusiasm…

There are not so many sea songs of ours; due to the  the fact that we are not a nation of the sea.
Even there are a number of existing,  theme is always loneliness and longing.
On watch, where loneliness returns to dreams, there is always a lovely one in the songs that comes out from the hert…
This lovely one is pain in the heart of the sailor, smoke in his head,
photograph between the pages of his book,
It is a song, a ballad, a poem spoken out towards the endless horizons…

The fact that it as difficult enough to be a sailor as to be waiting at the port.
If Sailor's heart bleeds, the heart that is waiting for him is bleeds, too...

In one ofhis poems, which was written from the lips of a waiting heart;  Greek Kavafis points out;
"You won’t find a new country, won’t find another shore.
This city will always pursue you.
there is no ship for you, there is no road.
As you’ve wasted your life here, in this small corner,”

The poet puts the point as follows:

" you’ve destroyed it everywhere else in the world. "

This id a poetic way of saying “Stop the nonsense fight of life; if you can not be happy with me, you can not be happy with no one, either!” to the Sailor!


Who knows how many were thinking of these words while waiting.
Some spoke out, some taken into.
Voyagers of the seas have realized this fact sooner rather than later.
The author of quote "You can not find a new sea," comes to the minds once.
Sometimes early,
sometimes after whatever would be done, is done…

* Barometer is tapped by a finger to give out a correct reading. .

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